LIVINGBLOSSOMS

Its hard, PhD. After 8 months, I now understand why. Its not that research or what you're doing is hard. It is not easy of course, but do-able. In fact, its not that different from the undergrad days. If you put enough effort, you will see the results. The thing thats so hard is actually trying to stay on this path without straying. It is the patience and persistence you need to continue doing the same thing every single day for 3 years. It is ignoring the feeling that life around you is passing by, friends getting married or earning promotions or the family moving on with their lives. It is not thinking about going on a long holiday somewhere when you know you have a 30 page writing up to do in 3 days. It is knowing when to say "No, I've work to do" when you would rather have fun.

Yet knowing this truth strangely does not make me feel better or more motivated. I fear the long road ahead. My dreams are often dark these days, bereft of the light of motivation that previously shone so brightly even during the darkest of nights.